Your Most Important Tool
The first and most important tool you will ever have is yourself. Despite the fact that you are rarely likely to think about it, caring for yourself is your most important job. Without it you have nothing to give and no way to help. You are a complex instrument that really needs to be kept in good working order. Just like your car, if you don’t take care of it, it won’t get you to work. I know you are thinking “OMG I don’t have time for that.” “She is going to tell me to go on a diet or take a yoga class.” No, she is not. She is going to give you some ideas for small things you can do that will take you no extra time but will help you feel better at work and at home.
This week we are going to start with breathing. Yes, I know you think you do this all the time. Well you do, but not necessarily in the ways that would be most helpful.
Several years ago, I was invited to attend a self-defense course. I entered the room, it was huge. Probably 300 people were there and I thought to myself how can they possibly teach self-defense to this many people at one time. The presentation began and they asked us to picture ourselves on the street at night, someone approaches, puts a gun to our heads and asks for our wallets. What is the first thing you do?
Most people catch their breath and hold it. This is your first mistake. Your brain is an organ that runs on oxygen. But, when you most need it the most, you stop feeding it. The criminal has the upper hand because you can’t think. So, you’re most important first step is to breath. Sounds simple, it’s not. You have to train yourself to take a breath when you are under pressure.
So, how is this relevant to you? When you are in the classroom and children act out, you most likely catch your breath and hold it. If we can retrain your body to breathe you will have a much better chance to be able to use your brain to help solve the problem, and a much better chance of having your reaction be helpful for both you and everyone else in the room.
How do we do that? We start by tuning in to your breathing at least three times a day. Pick three times in your day that you know will be more stressful than others, perhaps a transition time, the beginning or ending of class or whatever works for you. Remind yourself at those times to take three slow deep breathes. No one need know what you are doing. It is your secret. You are developing a tool.
Make a commitment to try this out for two weeks. Once you have gotten those three times a day down, try to remind yourself to breathe when something difficult comes up; a child acts out, you have an argument with your own child or spouse, or you are just finding your body tense up in response to someone else’s behavior. In your mind remind yourself you are feeding you brain, you are honing your most important tool.
Let me know how this works for you. See you in a couple of weeks!
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